Chapter Five* …"No, I’m Not Crazy"
I suppose that this post begins “Phase Two” of Our Story… the chapters until this point describe how the the Hubster and I went from meeting each other with a brief “hello” to “Will you marry me?” in just under two months. I’ve now told you how we met, fell in love and got engaged in 51 days, so…
This is the story of how the Hubster and I learned a little more about each other, had some big discussions about our future and planned a wedding for 200 guests in 5 months…
…and lived happily ever after*
Telling people I was engaged was actually a little more difficult than I originally thought it would be. Many of my friends had not yet met the Hubster, and even more didn’t even know that I was dating someone. You see, I used to be a little bit supersticious… I was so in love with him that I didn’t tell very many people as I was afraid it wasn’t going to last or that he couldn’t possibly love me as much as I loved him. I thought that if I kept it quiet then fewer people could talk, or spread judgement / criticism, etc. So as I began telling people that I was engaged, I often had to preface it by first explaining who he was… haha!
The night he proposed to me I told only my very closest friends as my family did not yet know. After the Hubster left that night I called two of my close friends in first year, Bo Bess and Ky, and told them that they needed to come over immediately. They rushed over, and as soon as I waved my new sparkly ring in their face they both sat me down on my bed and made me tell them over and over how it had happened. Their shock turned to surprise, which turned into concern, which eventually turned into happiness when they were satisfied that I was sane and happy. They supported me from that moment on which meant the world to me!
I also told Star* who, being the wonder woman that she is, freaked out and began planning my wedding immediately. haha! She hugged me over and over and her excitement for me helped relieve some of my anxiety over how people would react.
B-ry didn’t take it so well… after I explained how it had happened and told him that this was absolutely what I wanted he still looked at me like I was insane. It took him a few weeks to adjust to the fact that I was serious about my decision.
Bo Bandy was my last stop that night… by the time I reached his house it was nearly 3am. I wanted him to be last as he was my best friend and I was hoping to end the night on a positive note. After I sat down on his couch and told him the story all he needed to do was look at me to know that this was what I wanted and that was that. He didn’t criticize me, or look at me like I was crazy–he just walked over and gave me a huge hug and told me he was really happy for me. And also that he was driving me to B-Town the next morning at 8am so that I could tell my family.
I was terrified.
Bo Bandy talked the whole way to B-Town to help me calm my nerves. You see, even though my parents obviously had an idea that we were talking about marriage after the Hubster vs. Big Dad showdown, I don’t think they expected it to come quite so soon. Despite that, I knew that once the shock wore off they would support me. I wasn’t so sure about the rest of my family. I was the first of my siblings to get married… and my siblings had barely had a chance to meet the Hubster let alone get to know him. I knew that he hadn’t won over my sisters just yet and I was worried about their reaction. I knew my younger brothers would be surprised but wouldn’t look up from their video games long enough to make any kind of a stink. And I knew Doodle would be surprised and possibly concerned at first, but I hoped he would support me right away. In short, I wasn’t so much worried about their long-term feelings at this point, but was more or less terrified that when I told them that I was getting married that their first reaction would be that “concerned look”, and not happiness.
So, after a little thought, I took off my ring and hid it in my bag. I knew my mom was at work, and I wanted to tell her and my dad first so that they could help me decide how to tell my siblings. Bo Bandy came in with me (after promising not to say anything) and visited with my family for a few minutes before leaving to head back to the city. The next few hours were agony. I was DYING to wear my new beautiful ring and jump around and dance and shout that I was getting married, but I also wanted to tell them in a way that didn’t seem show-offy or insensitive.
After a while my siblings all piled into the basement to watch a movie and I snuck upstairs to play piano. I decided that since they were all on another floor that it would be ok to wear my ring for a while while I played. Somehow between the music and the movie downstairs I didn’t hear Peeah come up the stairs. I tried to slide my hand indiscreetly into my sleeve, but I wasn’t fast enough. She reached across and held my wrist with her eyes open wide and slid back my sleeve.
Her eyes went back and forth between my ring and my face for a minute before she said,
Peeah: “Are you engaged?!?!!”
Me: “Yes.”
Peeah: “When did this happen?? Why didn’t you say anything??”
I explained that I was nervous about her reaction and that I had wanted to tell Mom and Big Dad first. She looked a little hurt for a moment before telling me that I was crazy for thinking that and that of course she’d support me. She asked to see the ring again and demanded to know the whole story. After telling her she told me that I needed to call and tell my Mom. As if on cue my mother called on a break and I spilled the beans.
After that it was easy. Peeah took me downstairs and helped me tell the rest of my family, who despite some surprise and shock were happy for me… :) We left for the Great White North the next day where I was able to tell my extended family and my friends up north. By the time I got back to the city, nearly 5 days later, I collapsed into the Hubster’s waiting arms happy that the stress of announcing our engagement was almost over. I came home to an inbox FULL of emails from people who had heard rumors about our engagement and wanted them either confirmed or denied.
We responded with this:
Hey Everyone,
GUESS WHAT? I’m sure some of you have heard rumors about us by now—word seems to travel through the grapevine pretty fast these days. We know emails are a little impersonal, but we figured this would be the quickest way to let you all know our happy news!! The (soon-to-be) Hubster and I are engaged!! We’re looking at getting married towards the end of the summer—we’re very excited! We’ll let you know as soon as we have any more definite details!!
Much love,
Shop Girl & The Hubster
