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I share a lot about my life.
Usually it doesn’t bother me at all. Mostly I enjoy feeling like I’m letting people get to know the real me–even the ugly bits. Sometimes I pause and wonder what it’s like on the other side, for you, the wonderful people who read my never ending ramblings. I wonder sometimes how people “see” me… particularly those whom I interact with in real life. You know that I try to be open and honest about what I call the “good, the bad and the ugly” parts of my life. I talk a lot about my thoughts and the things I’m struggling with. I think that’s important. I think that so much…
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You’re Doing It Right*
To everyone who shared their stories about their babies with me last night– thank you. It helped. It’s frustrating, you know? It feels a little unfair. You do all the things you’re “supposed” to do, but still… Your baby is too small? You’re doing it wrong.Your baby is too big? You’re doing it wrong.Your baby doesn’t sleep? You’re doing it wrong.Your baby sleeps too much? You’re doing it wrong.Your baby is fussy? You’re doing it wrong.Your baby wants to be held? You’re doing it wrong. Your baby is different from this impossible standard to which we must all strive to achieve? You’re. doing. it. wrong. Except… Radical thought here. What…
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Wankie Tankie*
I think one of the hardest parts of parenting is keeping a straight face when your kids unintentionally say something they don’t understand. I’m usually pretty good at it. Tonight I was not. When H was a baby, he was also quite large. His nickname is “Hank”, and he quickly became known as Hank the Tank. It stuck, and we often still use it or the spin off, Hankie Tankie. As the dinner table tonight, S was commenting on how the short forms of P’s and W’s names rhyme. Not wanting H to be left out, she decided to make a new nickname for W that could rhyme with him.…
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Good Things in Big Packages*
Today was W’s two month checkup. It was our first time seeing my family doctor as we were with our midwives until now. I should preface this by saying that I love my doctor. We get along really well, and I will forever love her for how she reached out to me at home when she learned about my miscarriage. But today was… I don’t know. It was what it was. When she walked the the door, she warmly said hello to me, then smiled at W, who was calmly laying across my lap. Her eyes widened, then she smiled, and to him said: “Oh goodness! You’re so big! …why…
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Sometimes my anxiety is a jerk.
It’s extremely high today, and I know exactly why: I have friends coming over tomorrow. I often feel like my brain holds two separate entities: the Rational Brain (RB) and my Anxiety Brain (AB). Sometimes they coexist peacefully. Other times my Anxiety Brain tries to stage a coup and completely take over. (She can be mean when she wants to be.) Today was a hard day. It’s felt a little like this: Rational Brain (RB): “It’s going to be so good to see my friend tomorrow. I really need this. Anxiety Brain (AB): “You can’t possibly have friends over!! Your house is a disaster. Have you SEEN your floors?!” RB:…
