I’ve noticed that I’m finding happiness in the smallest things these days.
(Except in what came up when I google image searched the word “happy”. Apparently my definition of happy and the world’s view are slightly different. I was not expecting what came up. ha)
These past three weeks have just been marvelous. I haven’t even received a paycheck yet (and have absolutely no idea what I’m making either) but honestly–I don’t care. Mind you, the first paycheck will be glorious, but I’m so enjoying life as a substitute teacher that I’d happy just to keep teaching.
I can’t believe how different getting up every morning feels now. I wake up excited to begin my day–to meet the students and staff I’ll be with that day. I haven’t ever felt that way about a job, but this doesn’t even feel like a job. That’s how much I like it. Working at a crap part-time job for a year has certainly given me an appreciation for my chosen career. I had to work at the part-time job yesterday and I woke up dreading the start of the day, trying to find ways to delay the time I had to go in.
I don’t feel that way about teaching. I may someday, but not yet. :)
My lovelies, life is good.
The Hubster remarked in passing the other day that I haven’t had a “good cry” in a while. I don’t know about you, but every once in a while I just need to vent and let “it” all out, whatever “it” may be at the time. This usually comes in the form of a good old-fashioned cry-fest wherein something tiny will trigger all the emotions I’ve been feeling and I’ll sob uncontrollably cursing the world while the Hubster holds me tight. After nearly five years of marriage he is able to read me pretty well and can almost always tell when one is coming. As soon as it’s finished I always feel remarkably better until the next one hits several months later.
During our time at Hippie U it was often over my stress with assignments, feelings of loneliness (I had only a few close friends there before teacher’s college), stress about what to do with my life, etc. In the past year it’s mostly been about my own struggles with feelings of inadequacy and a sense of failure as month after month passed without prospects of a teaching job. He sweeps me into his arms and lets me cry it out, assuring me that despite whatever I’m going through, he’s right there beside me.
Well, lately there have been no tears. I’m finding happiness in all kinds of things.
The Job* Enjoying my new job is just one part of that. A big part, but just one piece of the happy pie.
My Marriage* The Hubster is another big piece. Sometimes I am taken aback by how happy he makes me, through just the littlest things. Even though it’ll be five years this summer, he still makes me feel beautiful just by the way he looks at me. He goes out of his way to make me smile and laugh, and he’s been beside me through thick and thin. He is the best friend I could have ever asked for.
Home* I also love where we live. After four years of feeling like I didn’t “fit in” with Senior’s City, living in Pretty City is like finding the perfect shoe–it just fits and was made for me. I can’t even really put my finger on it, but something about this tiny, beautiful city feels like home. I know I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life here.
Warm Weather* On another note, have you looked outside lately?! I cannot get enough of this weather!!!! The grass is green, the trees are full and the skies are blue, blue, blue. After a summer of crap, cold weather last year I am so pleased that summer decided to grace me with its presence in early May, instead of the traditional late June appearance. Yes, the classrooms are hot, but more sunshine and 30°C days please!
Also, shoes. Shoes bring me happiness. I have the BEST pair of new black flats that have stolen my heart. (Thanks Peeah!!!!!)
Books* I also started a book club two months ago, and I cannot even begin to tell you how excited this makes me. It’s still small and is still growing, but I really believe it has potential. I love being able to have a girls outing once a month and talk books. I realize this makes me the biggest nerd ever, but I can’t help it. I heart books.
Princess Pea* Being an aunt is the greatest thing ever. The little munchkin is growing faster than I can keep up with, but I had no idea how much I’d love her. I have uncontrollable urges to spoil her rotten at every opportunity, and I’ve decided this is probably why the Hubster always comes shopping with me. If I were by myself we would be broke and Pea would have everything pink I ever passed in a store. *shrugs*
What makes you happy?