I Need Help*

A picture came up in my Timehop app today.

It was the first post I made last year committing to going off sugar and trying to live a healthier lifestyle. It’s just a shot of me in a semi fitted shirt and skirt before heading out to church. I remember how I felt that day. I remember really looking at myself that morning– looking at how much my body has changed since having kids; looking at the parts I loved, and the parts I didn’t love quite as much. I remember feeling ready to do something about it.

I feel very much the same way now. I did really well for three or four months last year. Then I started my second specialist course and P stopped sleeping and old habits creeped back in. The gains I had made and the weight I had lost came back like old friends and have been hanging around ever since.

Looking at the photo brought up some mixed emotions for me. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little bit frustrated that I am back in almost the exact same place a year later–that the weight I worked so hard to lose just won’t stay lost. But at the same time, seeing that photo made me feel more determined than ever because I know that I can do it… I did it before. I’ve been mostly off sugar for two weeks now. I’ve had a few slips ups, and my motivation was weaker last week, but I restarted again today. I think the problem before was that I didn’t have a concrete goal. In September I set a goal to write every day for the entire month. Having the end date really motivated me… even if I keep extending it. ;)

So, I am going to stay off sugar for one month. I did it with writing, I can do it with this.

…I also need some help.

I had a long chat with my osteopath on Thursday night. I’ve tried a few short workouts and my hips just aren’t strong enough for me to do them yet. I’ve been back and forth about trying Beachbody for a year now, but I don’t feel strong enough to commit to it just yet. If I do too much my hips go out… and I’m reluctant to spend money on it when I’m not sure that I can even use it yet. He gave me some more strengthening exercises to try, and told me to try something more low impact if I want to try working out. The areas I want  / need to target are my thighs, core and the “junk in my trunk”. It’s all weak from having three babies back to back. I’m being very real when I say that I have never really worked out in my life. I was naturally athletic as a kid, and all I’ve ever done in my adult years is run. Now that running is off the table, I feel like I’m in this foreign territory and I don’t know the language.

I’d love to know what to do to help slim my thighs a bit and strengthen my core and glutes. I can’t really do a “workout” as my body just can’t sustain it right now, but rather a list of suggestions for separate exercises that I could do to get started. My list from the Osteo includes squats and planks, as well as a series of stretches to target my weakest areas. A gym membership isn’t really in the cards for me right now, so I am hoping to be able to do as much as I can from home.

I feel so awkward asking this, but Google is a vast expanse place and every website has different suggestions. I’m so lost, but I know I’ll never get anywhere if I don’t get over myself and admit that I need help.

So… I’m just a girl, standing in front of the internet, asking you to help me.

(Bonus points if you get the movie reference!)

I’m off to go do some squats or something.