What Couldn’t You Live Without?

I had my follow-up appointment with my optometrist today. When I went in a few weeks ago he was concerned about the fluid pressure in my eyes and wanted to run some extra tests to make sure I hadn’t developed glaucoma.

So, I arrived early and mentally braced myself for the dreaded eye puffer machine, which, thankfully, was not on the agenda for today. One of the tests I had done was to see if my peripheral vision has deteriorated. I had to put a pirate patch on one eye, stick my head into a machine and stare straight ahead at a small orange light. Small white lights then flashed intermittently in different places and I had to press a buzzer each time I saw one, without looking away from the orange light. It sounds easy, but after two minutes per eye I was more than ready to be finished.

I also had another test done that required freezing of my corneas. That’s right, FROZEN EYES. It felt SO weird. My optometrist put some special drops in my eyes and it froze my corneas and eye lids for about 15 minutes. He said this test was sort of like an ultra sound for my eyes.

The next test required another type of drop that made my tears yellow. So there I was in the optometrist’s office with yellow tears watering out of my frozen eyes doing all these tests waiting for my results.

It’s official: I’m a mutant.

…but I’m a mutant who doesn’t have glaucoma. :) I’m still a high risk candidate for it and will need to see the optometrist every year instead of two so he can monitor it, but I’m eye disease free for now. I can’t even begin to tell you how relieved I am.

While I knew deep down that he was just being cautious, the whole thing just got me thinking: what if I ever lost my eyesight? I honestly can’t even begin to imagine it. Even walking around without my glasses is terrifying as I can’t focus on the things I want to and I can’t see details on anything.

I’m big on details.

…could I live without them? I don’t know. After having sight for 25 years, for me (personally) it’s hard to imagine a life without it. Knowing I couldn’t see my mom’s face when we surprise her with something, or my niece’s little pig tails, or the sun as it peeks over the treetops in the morning would be very difficult to bear. I think I could easily let go of most of my other senses, but my sight is so precious to me. I could live without smell, touch or even taste, but I need my eyes.

But if it came down to a choice–keep my eyes or my ears, I don’t know what I’d choose. Not having music in my life (in the sense that I know it now) might be just as devastating as not having sight.

AH.

What couldn’t you live without?