My Word for 2019*

I seriously debated whether or not to publish my last post.

Actually, to be honest, I debated whether or not I should even write it. I knew it would be sad before I even sat down, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to put that “out there” on Christmas Day. In the end, I decided to write because I needed to write… and I’m so glad that I did. Immediately after I posted it I had a flood of messages and comments come in from some pretty wonderful people. It was an instant reminder that while I may have been without my big family at Christmas, I wasn’t alone. Thank you. <3

I’m happy to report that the rest of the week has been much better. The kids are recovering nicely and my amazing parents drove down yesterday and brought Christmas to us. We had several hours of visits, snugs, new toys and warmth that I had so missed on Christmas Day. I’m still bummed about not seeing my siblings, but hopefully I can make that happen soon.

While I was hammering out my feelings on the piano the other night, I started thinking about my word for 2019. Two years ago I decided to give up the tradition of making New Years resolutions or goals that I remember for three weeks then forget about until it’s time to make new ones. This in turn produces guilt over things not accomplished, which causes me to make strong declarations of commitment (again) to essentially the same goals which I will remember for about… three weeks. Repeat cycle.

At the beginning of 2017 I decided to simplify and chose one word that I would focus on for the year. Something that I could think about and incorporate on a daily basis. That year, I chose the word BRAVE, and for the first time, I really felt like I accomplished some of the goals I wanted to because that word was always echoing in the back of my mind. It felt awesome.

Last year, I chose the word STRENGTHEN. This one was harder for me. To be honest, it just didn’t hit home with me like brave had, and as I was reflecting on this while I played piano the other night, it felt like I hadn’t accomplished anything. I went back and found the blog post I had written about it last year, and was actually surprised to see that I had accomplished more than I thought. You can see the entire original post here, but these were a few of my goals that I wanted to strengthen:

—my talents. More than anything, I miss writing and the piano. {WIN. Still working on the piano piece, but I feel like I’ve finally gotten back on track with my writing.}
—my health. I just passed the one month mark of no sugar, and I’ve already lost 7.5lbs. I want to keep eating better and get this body back on track! {This has been up and down for me. More on this in 2019.}
—my friendships. {I got to know some really phenomenal people last year, and had some pretty awesome memories made with some friends I’ve known for a while. It was a great year for this. <3}
—my skills as a teacher. {I completed my dual honours specialist, and dipped a toe in the water as I went back to work. I feel good about that.}

So, it wasn’t a total bust. But I also knew I wanted something to make me push myself more in 2019. Something that would ring in my head for the entire year like BRAVE had. As I played and played piano the other night, it popped into my mind like an ear worm and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since. I knew right away that it was what I needed.

And it’s not one word, it’s two. 

My phrase for 2019 is DO IT. 

Here is my problem with just about everything: I am the best at thinking about doing something. I really am. I will think through every possible outcome and response, how others might react to something, or how I might react to something. I’ll think about how great I’ll feel when I actually do something I’ve been thinking about. All day long I have thoughts that pop into my head that I will think about, and they usually begin with the phrase “I should…”.

For example:

I should really do my stretches and exercises from my Osteopath.
I should grab that pile of clean towels and take them downstairs to the kitchen.
I should work out.
I should eat better.
I should message that friend I keep thinking about.
I should start writing my book.
I should put my phone down.
I should get back into music.
I should use social media less.

All of these things are things that I know that I WANT to do. I think about them all the time. I’m just SO BAD at translating these thoughts into action. I spend so much time wishing I was doing them, instead of, you know, just actually doing them.

So, for 2019 my word(s) are DO IT. Stop thinking about it, and just do it. I have so many things that I want to accomplish, and I’ll never get any of it done if I don’t make them happen. I’m just going to start trying things. I hope some will stick, I’m sure some won’t, but at least I’ll know that I tried. I started it today and I already feel like I’ve accomplished something.

Well, that’s my word. What’s yours?