Today is day 3 of no sugar.
I went off chocolate 10 days ago to kick start it, and decided to go off almost all of the rest on Monday. The first two days weren’t so bad. I still felt really motivated and determined to go through with it, so I powered through.
By dinnertime last night I was bored. I desperately wanted a treat, and when you’re in that place a clementine orange is not the same as a brownie. But by that point I was almost done two days, and decided to just try and keep going.
Today is a different story. Today I’m in the ragey place. My sugar cravings are SO FIERCE and I have been fighting all day to not give in. I was able to keep busy this morning, but now P is sleeping and the house is quiet and this is always when I “reward” myself for, you know, keeping my kids alive. I’m eating nuts and fruit, drinking water and staying full, but all of these things are not chocolate chip cookies, which is what my brain is telling me I really want.
I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.
I had book club last night. Last month we read Then She Was Gone by Lisa Jewell. It’s one of those books that grips you and draws you in, and I couldn’t put it down for two days until I finished. When I wasn’t reading it, I was thinking about it, and then when I was done the story haunted me a little. It was nice to be able to talk about it last night… before we moved on to Chinese food restaurants, Columbine, The Lost Boys and rats. I never quite know how our conversations end up where they do, but it’s always hilarious to see where we drift to.
Our next book is Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan. This is another book I probably wouldn’t have picked up on my own, so I’m interested to see what all the hype is about. I heard the movie was pretty good, so we’ll see how the book is. I’ll keep you posted.
I feel like I should probably go do something and be productive while P is sleeping, but I also feel like catching up on This is Us is probably a better use of my time. I need more Toby in my life.