I mentioned that I’ve been doing some thinking about the future of my blog.
I’m not going to lie, right now I find it very difficult to find time to write. Between taking care of the kids, trying to stay on top of the house and attempting to spend a little time with the Hubster, I don’t have a lot of extra time to throw around. And honestly, when those magical “free moments” appear, I’m often too burnt out to write anything coherent.
That being said, I’ve been thinking about my little blog, and I hate that I’m not writing. I started I Heart My Shoes eight years ago (eight years!) and I have chronicled so much in that time. I think about who I was back then–a newly married university student who was struggling to find herself in a new city–and I marvel at how far we’ve come. From those first posts as a shoe-obsessed second year university student, I’ve written my way through my undergrad, teacher’s college, my job search, my marriage and my entrance into parenthood. There is so much here.
But I also look at this and think: is this still me? When I started this, it seemed natural to title it after something I adored–shoes. Oh, shoes. Eight years ago I had over 100 pairs in my closet and I coveted every cute pair of heels that I saw.
Don’t get me wrong, I still love shoes. It’s just not in the same way. My collection has dwindled and quite frankly, these days I’m more interested in comfort than the latest fashion. I can’t even remember the last time I bought a pair of shoes just because I wanted to. They just aren’t my passion anymore… so I sometimes look at my blog and feel like it and I don’t fit together anymore.
In the last few years I’ve realized that my passion for shoes has diminished as I’ve discovered new passions in running my home, cooking, and my career as a teacher. I don’t feel that I’m the same person that I was when I became Shop Girl and began I Heart My Shoes. Should that matter? Does it? Should my blog change as I’ve changed over the years?
So, what do I do? I know that I want to keep writing, I just need to feel more connected to where I do it. I’ve debated whether or not it was time to end my journey here and start somewhere new, but that didn’t feel right. This has been my home for too long, and I don’t want to leave it just yet. My question now is whether it’s time to leave “I Heart My Shoes” behind and take on a new name–something more reflective of who I am today.
I honestly don’t even know where June went. I feel like it was the end of May then all of a sudden I blinked and it’s July 8th. It was a jam-packed month full of loveliness–here’s a few of the highlights!
I began the month with a momentous occasion: I went out by myself for the first time since Hank was born. My hair has been falling out like crazy, so I finally booked a hair appointment and chopped off five inches in length and about five pounds in weight. Hank and I have been attached at the hip since he was born and he wasn’t terribly happy that I left, but it was so nice to have two whole hours by myself.
The head massage was pretty nice too. :)
The rest of the month was a blur of play dates, birthday parties and visiting with friends. It seemed like we had something on every other day, and while my poor chore chart sat neglected, Ruby’s social life thrived. My little bean loves to be around other kids, and I feel bad that most of the time she is stuck hanging out with me!
She is growing and changing faster than my heart can handle. She has lost all her toddler rolls and is now a tall, beautiful little girl. She is so smart, funny, independent and determined–and we’ve learned that she definitely has a temper to match her red hair. June brought us a wave of defiance that had us pulling our hair out for a while, but she seems to have calmed down and will do just about anything to avoid a time-out. Her vocabulary is the best part–every day she comes out with some new word or phrase that I have no idea how she learned. While she definitely lets you know when she wants something, her manners are wonderful and I’m so proud of her!
Today was Hank’s four month check-up, and our “little” boy weighed in at 20lbs 4.5oz. I’m not going to lie–I’ve been a little concerned about his size because he’s just so much bigger than Ruby ever was. He’s perfectly proportioned, but he’s just… big. I spoke to my doctor about it, but she had no concerns. He’s totally healthy and all his measurements are on the same curve (above 95th percentile) and she just thinks that Hank is going to be a tall, strapping young lad.
Hank has the sweetest little personality and is almost always ready with a smile. In the last four weeks he learned how to roll over (both front to back and back to front) and he surprised me with his first word: “mum”. He’s not much of a napper during the day, but he sleeps pretty well through the night so I can’t complain. :)
June also brought my 29th birthday, and a visit from the Hubster’s mom! We were so happy to have her stay with us, and we spent a wonderful week together. Ruby is still asking, “Where’s Grandma?” The Hubster took a week of holidays, and we took a trip out to Center Island, went shopping, visited with family, ate too much and probably slept too little… but it was so worth it. We’re already looking forward to her next visit!
And now here we are in July, and I’ve somehow gone nearly five weeks without writing again. I’m still not entirely sure how to fit this into my new life as a momma of two, but after reflecting seriously on the future of my little blog (more on this soon) I’m still not ready to give it up completely. I’ll figure it all out somehow.